My Mother's Eyes - Jeremy Ray - ★★★.¾

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AUTHOR: Jeremy Ray
GENRE: Short Story
RATING: 3.75 stars.

In a Nutshell: A good, emotional short story, but not as impactful as ‘The Houseplant’, my favourite work by this author.


Story Synopsis:
Written in the first person of teenaged Jordie, the story tells us of his attempts to keep his memory of his mother alive forever, by sketching her as she lies in a coma. However, her body doesn’t look like her anymore, and more importantly, he doesn’t remember what her eyes looked like and has no photograph to fall back upon.
Jordie’s elder brother isn’t happy about all the sketching, but Jordie pays him no heed.
Will Jordie be successful in his quest to capture his mother on paper?


Author Jeremy Ray writes brilliant microfiction. His newsletter subscribers get treated to a new micro story every week. If you want to check out his brilliant mind, this newsletter is a good way of sampling his works. I first stumbled upon him through ‘The Houseplant’, which remains one of my favourite contemporary short stories. I was hoping for a similar experience this time around, but it is tough to match up to such a memorable work.

The premise in this story is quite emotional, and it gets further amped up when we learn the reason why Jordie’s mom is in coma. However, as the writing is in first person, the overall setting stays gloomy and the backstory remains half-explained. While the ending was touching, it left me wanting a lot more.

This would have worked far better for me had it been a novella as it left me with more questions than answers.

I must mention the unrelated micro-story that is present at the beginning of this work. That was brilliant!

If you are the kind of reader who seeks closure from a short story, this isn’t for you. But you would like reading a slice-of-life styled short piece, do try this one.

The story is available for free to Kindle Unlimited subscribers.

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