When Someone You Love Has Died - Stephanie Seidler

AUTHOR: Stephanie Seidler

ILLUSTRATOR: Berk Ozturk

GENRE: Children's Picture Book

RATING: 4.75 stars.

A beautiful book for little children who are coping with a death of a loved one in their families.

The content is written in a second person narration addressed to the little child reading the book. It talks of death in a very simple-to-understand manner – ‘the body stops working’. It then introduces the idea of grief, why people might be visiting their home or why their loved ones might be crying. The book then suggests some methods that might help the child to cope.

There are a whole load of things I loved about this picture book:

🌷 The explanations are secular. There’s no heaven or God or divine reference. As such, the book will work regardless of religious affiliations.

🌷 The content is well suited to the target age of 2-6 years. Easy language, simple rhymes, comprehensible situations, and practical solutions.

🌷 No needless philosophy or platitudes as well.

🌷 I am not usually a fan of rhythmic verses since many indie books tend to force in the rhymes. But in this book, while the rhymes aren’t very jazzy, they work in terms of meter and hence are good for reading aloud without breaking the rhythm.

🌷 The second person point of view, which I have rarely seen in picture books, works brilliantly. The writing has the feel of a beloved elder guiding the little reader on the confusing journey of understanding what’s happening around them in times of loss.

🌷 Trickier questions, such as ‘Where do people go after they die”, have not been tackled. I like this decision because the answer to this question is highly faith-dependent and a generic answer wont work. Such questions are better addressed by parents/guardians rather than books.

🌷 The illustrations suit the story well. They aren’t too vibrant as to overpower the core message, and they are still beautiful enough to merit a second gaze.

🌷 There are four full pages addressed to the parents. These contain valuable guidelines such as how to speak to your child about death, how to speak with the child’s teacher about the recent loss in the family, how to answer questions about your own sadness. I found this entire section wonderful because the approach is so hands-on.

Overall, a brilliant book. If you have had a recent death in your family and want an easy way of letting your children know that the pain is okay, do pick this up. Strongly recommended.